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  • Writer's pictureMindy Abbeduto

5 Biggest Mistakes Couples Make When Planning Their Wedding

Excitement is in the air, you've been recently engaged and if you're like any girl out there, pretty much already have your wedding day planned out, minus a few details, am I right? It is hard to not jump into planning and hit the ground running as you are filled to the brim with ideas, to-do's and a whole lot more. Planning the biggest party you'll ever plan in your life can be a smooth experience or a complete nightmare. I'm going to go over a few BIG mistakes I see couples make when they are planning their wedding in hopes that you can prevent this from happening and you can enjoy every minute of the planning process.

Not hiring your Dream Team of Vendors

You might be thinking…well, we can have ‘so and so’ do this and save a few bucks. While that ‘could’ be a possibility, this is one of the biggest mistakes couples can make. This isn’t saying that you can’t leave a few of your trusted loved ones in charge of a few things but know that it IS a big responsibility on their part and is also most likely someone you want to celebrate with and enjoy the day with. Sorta hard to do when you’re also a working guest.

It is totally ok to pass off a task or even a big project to a loved one or trusted friend but when it is something out of your scope, it is best to leave it to the professionals. This will not only save you time and money in the long run, your hired professional is going to be a major asset in your planning journey, leaving you time, money and energy to put towards something else.

When you do hire out, make sure to do your research! You don’t want to hire just anyone for the price tag that tickles your fancy. This is important! You don’t want to be working with someone you totally don’t jive with on your big day.

Best way to start with finding your dream team of vendors is to ask for referrals! Who better to ask than your BFF or Cousin Sally who they loved and would recommend? If you can’t get an immediate referral, start looking on line in your area. Check out websites and social media sites and see which vendors resonate with you and who’s style matches your vibe. Always arrange to meet with a vendor before signing any contracts!

Assuming DIY is always the Cheaper Option/Taking on too much

Ok, this is going to be a tough one to get through but hear me out. DIY. I am a HUGE advocate of doing things DIY but… my reasoning is likely different than a lot of you. I personally love to DIY because that’s just who I am, it’s in my nature and I love to do things myself. I am super crafty and ultra-creative. Not everyone is, and that is OK! If you are cool! Now, someone who isn’t really into making things or feels they couldn’t get the same results as the picture they are going off of, probably shouldn’t attempt to do something DIY, especially before your wedding.

You especially don’t want to take on a project of something you have never done before on your own. A really good example here are invitations. Many couples start looking at invitations and see the price tag, which can be pretty steep. This is a huge project that couples think they can DIY to save a bunch of money and really, unless you are a graphic designer you really are better off ordering through a wedding vendor or if you really want to do them solo, try a website like vista print.

DIY isn’t always the cheaper option when you consider the time and materials going into it. Is it really worth it for you in the end?? You might spend more in materials and be stressed out for weeks on end when you could just pay someone to do it for you. You really need to weigh it out!! Ask around for help too!

Including Traditions just for the sake of Tradition

Another great big mistake couples make when planning. Doing something on their big day or in preparation of their big day just because it is ‘what everyone does’. It’s hard, I totally get it! You want to do something cool and unique but sometimes those who have a large part in the planning and paying for the wedding, have other plans. Like parents and grandparents at times.

I was your typical off-beat bride who just wanted a small beautiful outdoor garden ceremony, in the evening at sunset before inviting guests for an all-night hot appetizer buffet and drinks while dancing the night away to a blues band. Talk about wanting to do things completely out of the norm! Both my parents and my soon to be in-laws weren’t too sure of the plans we had cooking up our sleeves, but we assured them this is what we wanted, and we still honored those special traditions as requested. They all loved that we did something outside the norm, made great memories and still talk about it today!

With that being said, don’t just include traditions just to include them. If it is something you really don’t want to do, guess what, you don’t have to! It’s your wedding! You want to wear a black dress, DO IT! You want to get married on the side of a mountain at dawn, Hell yes-who wouldn’t want to? The key thing here is, do what YOU want! You don’t have to be in a white gown, marching down the aisle of the chapel just because that is what we’ve been seeing for years upon years.

Keeping up with the Jones's

It is pretty hard to stay in your lane when wedding planning. One of the biggest mistakes couples make is trying to ‘out do’ someone else’s wedding by ‘one upping’ in one area or another. Pinterest and other online resources don’t make it any easier either when we are seeing picture perfect set ups and events.

Don’t fall into that trap! Just because you went to a wedding who had say a live caricaturist doing drawings of all the guests that everyone thought was AH-MAAZING doesn’t mean that your guests will react the same way. Your wedding day should be a reflection of you as a couple and your lives together.

Trying to keep up with what others are doing can be expensive and exhausting. It most likely isn’t anything that you love either, otherwise it would have been on your wedding ‘want’ list from the start. Remember that your wedding day is special because it is yours and nothing that anyone one else had or is going to have at theirs is going to change how amazing your day is.

Worrying about Pleasing Others

This goes back into the tradition topic too. A lot of stress can come from trying to make someone else happy especially when you are planning your wedding day and want it to be special. The best thing you can do here is communicate well about your wishes and plans to those who are involved. Don’t stress about something that is out of your control and don’t worry about hurting someone’s feelings.

Do you know how many times I’ve had the discussion with couples who are worried about what their Aunt Suzie is going to say when she gets the invite to their wedding that doesn’t include their 5 heathen kids?! More than I care to discuss! ‘Whaaat??? I can’t bring my kids?! How dare you exclude them?!’. Sure, they might be upset at first but ultimately it is your decision. The last thing you need to be worrying about when planning your wedding is pleasing others! Trust me on this,just do your thing!

These are just a few of the biggest mistakes couples make when they start planning. Weigh out the pros and the cons before deciding anything. Keep open communication between your honey to avoid any miscommunication and arguments.

Have any of you stumbled upon anything you regret doing while planning for your big day? Is there something you would like to do over? Let’s hear it!

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